Happy June beautiful souls!

Learning how to ask for what you need is a powerful agent of transformation. When you speak up for what you need, you begin to attract what is necessary for your needs to be met—and your life changes.

Voicing on the outside what is true inside creates your reality, your words make things so. So, if you have been trying to do all this spiritual and emotional work on your own and you have not asked for help, this is when I tell you that you can only go so far alone : )

You can get insights on your own, reading books and taking courses but without a witness in the flesh combined with your voice asking out loud for support, you are only doing the preliminary work of transformation. Things really change when you speak up and give your heart's needs a voice.

But often, we don't even know what we need. Especially if it's been a long time since we’ve listened and connected to that part of ourselves. It can be difficult to access your desires if you have been ignoring them for a long time.

Figuring out first what you don’t want opens up that space inside for you to explore your true needs. Aversions communicate more loudly, so they are easier to spot. Like being in the presence of a particular person, for example. Perhaps, when you are with that particular individual, you feel on guard, not able to be yourself, aware of an impulse to protect yourself, or a feeling that the other person wants something from you. These are signs that this person is not life-giving for you at this time, and it’s probably time to take a break. It is difficult to give voice to your heart when you are protecting yourself.

Sometimes your mind may start negotiating. Even if you notice some of these feelings, you may find yourself thinking, “it’s more complicated than that,” especially if this person is deeply embedded in your life. It’s your mind’s job to weigh facts and process complexity, but your embodied wisdom keeps it simple. Listen to the messages it is sending you. For example, do you have a feeling of heaviness, contraction in the chest, interrupted breath, or a pit in your stomach? Are you quick to anger, slow to relax, feeling out of your body and in your head?

Here’s a great litmus test, courtesy of modern technology. The next time you receive a text from a particular person, notice how you feel. Irritated, tense, on edge? That’s a clear indicator to block their number, at least for a while. You don’t need to write them off forever, but for some reason, your body is in fight or flight when this person contacts you. Take time apart to give your body the space to examine and heal whatever belongs to you and you will be able to go back to this person, if you wish, much stronger and grounded. Then it will be much easier to hear the quiet whispers of your soul.

AB xo