Oh, this is a juicy topic. It is of the hour. I am so fascinated by our desire as human beings to put others on a pedestal, to give our power away in order to feel some peace, some respite from our suffering, some lasting joy.

I did it. Beginning with my mother, for a long long time, then with “mother figures" like Sai Maa, and Anita, then with “father figures” like Wayne and with priests in the Catholic church growing up. I did it with men. Oh did I ever betray myself in my teens and my twenties, when I crossed the boundary line between “I want to share love with you” and “this is not ok but I can't remember where to find my voice”. I even did it with Paul to some extent. It is hard-wired in me, conditioned deep in my cells, to feel like another has my answers, another holds my worth, the key to my success, to my ultimate happiness.

Sometimes these happenings have opened up doors within myself and gave me access to more profound dimensions...